Festive Honours List

Hot news from last night's award ceremony at the Soil Baron's Ball.

1. Best vegetable - Pea
2. Most improved crop - Carrots, Special commendation: Coriander
3. Best transplant from an Oxford allotment - Rhubarb
4. Most underrated vegetable - Leeks
5. Overabundance with little clue as to what to do with it award - Chervil
6. Biggest disappointment apart from Dowson contribution to the blog - cabbages (root fly, pheasant interference, pigeon peck, deer chomp, hare cut)
7. Most unlikely achievement - harvesting artichokes from my 2010 sowing
8. Most unlikely achievement for 2011 given current temperatures - harvesting any more artichokes from my 2010 sowing
9. Special onion-related achievement award - was to be awarded to Al Lotment but withheld by the jury at the last minute
10. Thing to look forward to on Shallow Onions in 2011: too numerous to mention but probably something related to soft fruit or the newly planted orchard.

Hope you get lots of seedy gifts in your Christmas wellie and all the best in the new growing season.

Burn Baby Burn

Well, my prayers were answered and we are sweltering in a brief interglacial. Perhaps this would be a good time to introduce you to my river, technology permitting. Everyone should have one.

The Plot Thickens...

Sometimes there's nothing you can do but sit back and admire your handiwork. At least we've got off lightly so far though! I am now praying to the norse god Thaw for an off-white Christmas as I have 21 orchard trees impatiently waiting to get their feet dirty.

Trailer Trash

We are trying to fit in with the country social set, you know, and our latest ploy is this new toy. Let's hope I haven't been seen trying to reverse it round a corner -all very counter-intuitive typically ending up in an embarrassing jackknife position. However, it's already earning its keep foraging for firewood.I'm forever having to remove fallen branches from the road on the way to work - I guess it's the one benefit of living in such a windy environment. The trailer is earmarked for pilfering the foresters' wood chip that abounds round here, which we will use as mulch; for gathering horsey waste from that country set I was talking about; and then for moving house on the cheap. Perhaps might wash it down in between those last two chores, though.

Chard Winter in Prospect

Seems everything's quiet here; perhaps you've all tucked up the plot for the winter. Still going strong myself. The plot can be at its most attractive in winter with its contrasting colours and textures, and still plenty for the pot as long as you like cabbages. I'm sure you are aching to play spot the veg so in the picture you'll see: purple sprouting, cavolo nero, curly kale, fennel, baby rocket, celery, swiss chard, bull's blood beet, winter black radish, chervil, asparagus ferns, and, a little of out of place, my experimental quinoa which is about to harvested by the thimbleful. I've always been fond of chard. He was the free-scoring left back in the all conquering 1986-87 Cobblers side, but since retirement has been lining up for me through the cold season. I'll be making a cut in the next month, it will probably die back in severe frosts but the main purpose is for an early show of fresh leaves once the weather warms up. Ah, Spring, just around the corner.

Infeasibly large pumpkin harvest

I was nearly caught out by a nip of unforecast frost this week. Time to gather in those pumpkins and squash that have been running rampant on a pile of manure. This all took me back to the old Viz character, Buster Gonad, who you will recall was afflicted by a freak medical condition which meant he had to ferry his testicles in a wheelbarrow on his numerous adventures. I hope he got them in before the frost hit. My 17 specimens weighing a total of 45kg are now curing in the kitchen and lounge before be moved to a cooler storage space, where hopefully they will last through till spring.

Whole Lotta Raking Going On

When I was 13, I never realised how useful pythagorus would eventually prove. I can tell you, should you ever find yourself in a similar position, that setting out a regular hexagon by eye won't necessarily go according to plan. With the geometry mastered, the Long Border has been deturfed, flattened, tilled, and seeded with green manure. Unfortunately, the emerging greenness on the right is not field beans but chickweed, an overlooked edible salad leaf - but I challenge anybody to eat it in the quantities that grow here. To be honest, I have no idea what I'm going to do with this area but it feels like we've achieved something.

Don't try this at home

Celery, probably the crop of most effort for least reward. Meticulous preparation, copious amounts of water and nutrients, fiddly blanching arrangements and a long growing season just to find the heart rotted or eaten by slugs. Or so I thought! I skipped the meticulous bit but we are swimming in water and nutrients here. And with this stumpy self blanching variety, there's no need for the earthing up or wrapping in cardboard nonsense. Only problem now, what the hell can you do with celery?

Not so shallow onions

Well DSB you have been busy - your orchard purchase almost replicates the delights of my favourite christmas carol. Please find an example of how to tie your shallow onion alas though these were not award winning.

We are currently planning the plot for next year although we have successfully grown Cauliflower for the first time.

I am with al lotment - bit of weeding is about as extravagant as I am getting this autumn but your hexagonal centre piece sounds like a great plan. Would possibly be worth a blogger coach trip to the north of Scotland - what do you reckon Al?!

Local Hero

Legend has it that it was watching repeated showings of Local Hero on Film4 that we finally made the decision to move north. A pilgrimage was therefore in order so last weekend we took time out from plot to visit the star of the film, the telephone box in Pennan, a village about an hour east of here. As you can see we are finally enjoying some late summer sunshine. It's about time I updated you on the plot though. Things have moved on a lot. After threatening for several months, and despite my protestations, Valerie hired a digger to remove the weed-infested remnants of a dry-stone wall and a few boulders undisturbed since the Flandrian. The effect is to make the area look vast. It also means that I can lay out the pattern of beds. Partitioning a an equilateral triangle into something practical proved quite difficult and numerous clever designs have been binned by the artistic director. We seem to have settled on a 12 metre wide hexagon as the focal point with paths heading to all parts between its constituent triangles. The hexagon, being off-centre, allows most of the remaining beds to be orientated with the midday sun. The plan is for the area eventually to be divided up into "rooms" for increased wind protection, with the partition walls comprising cordon apples and redcurrants, and rampant climbers like kiwi and hops. Today, we will order our orchard to populate the top of the slope; 5 plums, 3 damsons, 3 pears, 2 cherries, a rather speculative quince, and few apples. Lots to do this autumn. I'll keep you posted.

Minding your peas and cues

Well, you'll have to wait till next year for anything on cucumbers because I forgot to sew them. Peas, on the other hand, have got to be the pick of the crop, as the saying goes. Peas, as you probably know, have a bit of a thirst and work best in a cool climate, toiling away to their utmost at 15 to 18 degrees in damp soils. At the first sign of high summer sunshine though, they pack up and head for the beach to top up their tan. Still in the green here, some have even made it as far as the plate. These ones have blue and pink flowers and purple pods - yet to find out what they taste like but they look the part. Couldnt possibly be confused with sweet peas though, Al.

How shallow are thy onions?

Just to show what can be achieved with these pesky bulbs, even without the luxury of autumn planted sets. These are my "Purplette" variety, sown from seed en masse in a pot in mid March and transplanted into the ground at the start of May. The advantage of seed is a much wider range to choose from and... err thats probably it, oh and smugness of course. Most are now at a respectable 5cm diameter, no pests (apart from one which succumbed to cattle hoof squash syndrome) and no bolting. Once you get the depth right (top of bulb always visible, remember) the key things are meticulous weeding in the early stages and then adequate water when they are swelling (and weve had plenty of that!). I then clear away the soil to expose them to the sun and to make them more blogogenic. Now another decision, when to pull? I need a sunny day and ideally a dry spell to leave them out in the sun, otherwise they will hang in front of the window in the shed. This is preparation for storing of course - if you can't want to make a big vat of onion soup you can skip this phase.

Village Show

Hello DSB - lovely looking beetroot. Poor crop on our patch this year I'm afraid. Although we did not retain our Dwarf Fench Bean crown this year Lucy S and I managed to get third place with our 'any other vegetable not on the list' entry and third place for the beans (to be fair last year there was only two entries so destined to win - more entries this year!). Onions and runners didn't place (i did have high hopes for the onions - oh well) See attached photo showing the lovely pumpkin! I hope you are cleaning up on the award front up there! I hear there is a plot inspection at the end of October! maybe it will even tie in with the Oxford V Cobblers match!

Beetroot Generation

I am sure you are all congratulating yourself on your beetroot this year. I don't wish to burst your pride, but it is probably the least demanding of vegetables. Now you've mastered it, perhaps try the yellow variety. It is a little fussier, more subtly flavoured and has the added advantage of you not looking like you've severed an artery while skinning it. Also available in white and concentric white stripes; and, to those who care about looks and contrast on the plot, there is a variety with a beetroot-coloured leaf.

Common wisdom is that beetroots are best eaten at golfball size. That is easier said than done of course with, by September, your early sowings more the size and texture of crown green bowls. The trick is successional sowing which requires a discipline alien to most novice growers with limited space. Three week intervals works well for beets. The other thing, also difficult to bring myself to do even now,is to thin the seedlings. This applies to most crops but, for beetroot, you sow not a single seed but a whole cluster. I thin to about 3-4cm and harvest alternate roots when young allowing the others to grow on.

For our southwest contingent once rumoured to frequent this blog: note the way the leaf rib is the same colour as the root. In the root identity parade shown in the picture, the impostor radish is second from the left.

The Fennel Frontier

Now fennel has a bit of a reputation as the primadonna of the plot, prone to sulking and taking its bulb home as it were. Funnily enough, I've never had any such trouble - takes one to grow one perhaps. First thing to know is that there are cousins: the aforementioned stocky lady, Florence, and her promiscuous tall lanky relatives Herb and his darker brother Bronze. The latter two are a striking presence in any setting - I go for their looks and that prolific seed, used in curries etc.

For bulbs you need a bulbing, Florence or Finocchio fennel. Unlike her cousins, Florence may not turn up for a date as scheduled and so sow 3 or 4 seeds at 15-20cm intervals in one place and thin to one once germinated. Supposedly, if she is too hot, cold, wet, dry or has a headache, she bolts and you get a lot of hard stem and not too much of her exquisite clothing. The one pictured was sown in May and served up in a risotto verde with some broad beans and courgettes on Friday. Apparently, the bolting is less of a problem when sown after midsummer, so sow now for braising in red wine in the autumn.

Going global

I sat back at the plot in the evening sun [and howling wind] yesterday and for the first time felt that I was stating to achieve something; things coming to fruition as it were. To celebrate, I begin a new series on what is putting on a show on the plot and what's been a wet lettuce.

The first to be featured is a stately presence on the plot, spiky silvery foliage, a seemingly tough outer shell but with a delightful soft heart, an acquired taste valued more highly in Italy. I could be talking about Al Lotment, but this is in fact the globe artichoke. The moment when the first bud appears nestled amongst the long ribs is one of the highlights of the growing year. After a grapple with a sharp knife, they are delicious with a simple knob (no, that's not Al again) of butter. To be honest, if you want to eat artichokes, go to Italy or buy a jar of carciofi all'olio. But to the conscious aesthete, this queen of the plot is indispensible. Sow his perennial from seed and harvest the same year or steal a root cutting from your local artichoke farmer's field.

Abel and cole - yeah whatever!

Well DSB it seems you are taking a Mark Sharpe way of thinking regarding your new pump - I am sure I have a lot of suitable equipment in a site office in an undisclosed location that may benefit you. Any how - onwards - as my Mark says things like facebook status updates are for fishing for compliments which I now unashamedly do now! I attach a photo of my first Abel and Cole style veggie box - I would like it noted for the record that as of yet there are no onions but I am off to harvest some tomorrow. I hope the blizzards and heavy rain due up north over the next few days do not hamper your garden in any way! Hope you are both well.

Pump Action

We havent been suffering the suffocating heat you're experiencing down there - those northerly winds have been keeping us on our toes. But February to June is a marked dry season up here. There's been no significant rain since May and the plot would resemble the dustbowl if it wasnt for the chest-high grass, dock and thistle. The trudge up the slope with two full watering cans finally took its toll and so I bit the bullet and bought a not too sustainable petrol suction pump that can suck the burn dry and deliver the goods at 100 litres per minute. The start of the annual Monsoon is forecast for Thursday so I'll have to view it as a long term investment.

Rake's Progress

Thought you'd all like to see how my lazy beds are coming along. I sensed a bit of scepticism from Al Lotment, but as you can see they are thriving. The Pink Fir Apples on the right have been earthed up. As I'm sure you don't need reminding, they tend to grow much closer to the surface than other varieties and have a habit of turning green in the light.

First Cut

We've had the first modest crop off the new plot and celebrated wildly with a sag paneer and stewed rhubarb with orange and honey. Both these seem to do better than in Oxford. The rhubarb must like the dampness and the acid soil while spinach enjoys the cool conditions and amazing absence of slugs. Can't believe the slugs won't find out about this paradise at some point. Meanwhile we've had our first pest attack of a much more alarming kind. The neighbouring cattle often come over to check out my variety of artichokes or advise that I should have provided wind protection when I planted out my beans. Now though, one has taken a step further and pinched out the tops of the peas for me. The hoof prints through the spring onions and structural problems in my leaning towers give it away. Fortunately, the offender was a food connoisseur and stepped carefully through the artichokes and asparagus.

first strawberries!

Well DSB apologies for the prolonged absence - as you correctly noted we are in full gardening flow here (although Al lotment is in race prep mode!). I have (hopefully) managed to attach some photos of the new allotment. I hope things in the great north are fine and dandy and you are reaping your full crop. How awful to be subjected to web filters - as long as the cobblers website is still allowed - otherwise I suspect you may have to fill you days doing work! ta ta for now

Re-boot

I guess there are two possibilities for the tumbleweeds on here. Either the first flush of spring enthusiasm has been flushed away and your plot is now neglected as you enjoy other distracting pursuits or youre too busy with the azada to share your thoughts. For me, it's the council's new web filter which seems to have blocked my access. On top of that I've been enjoyed many late nights down at the plot with the sun going down after ten oclock. We had snow on 12 May but that didnt hang around very long and a week of very warm weather has got the soil up to around 15 deg, which would be ideal for planting out all the tender stuff I sowed before I went on holiday. Unfortunately we now have a bitter wind from the north so I've been concentrating on soil preparation. Lots still to do. Watch this space... and perhaps even contribute.

Leaning Tower of Peas

Anybody there? I've been too busy to blog sowing my sweetcorn, 3 types of courgette, 4 types of pumpkin and 4 types of bean. And the plot now looks a bit more recognisable as a vegetable garden. Potatoes are all lazy bedded. Beetroot, fennel and spinach in. I've been pilfering willow branches from the woods for my high peas. Broad beans coming along and the artichokes are now in the ground but under fleece to protect against the wind. It's been a tad chilly, less than 10deg, and the north wind looks set to continue for a good while. All in all, a dood time to be off for 10 days in Tuscany. So you won't hear from me until I've got for you a few seedy items from the back streets of Fosdinovo. Al, keep an eye out for me on Giro Stage 6: I'll be dressed as an artichoke and wielding an azada.

The Bigger Picture

There's more to life than soil and seedlings. Weekend was spent up in the northwest. Valerie was learning how to turn a large cable bobbin into a outdoor mosaic table. Meanwhile, I did a couple of modest mountains and a pootle on my bike around the mildly picturesque North Assynt coast road. It’s not the Cotswolds but it has its moments.

It would help if I figured out how to upload the photos!

The new Greenhouse

Well I thought I would just show you my new greenhouse - I went down there tonight and everything is growing absolutely marvellously. It is an old conservatory and we were very excited about our work bench! Lucy's Grampy also has the most amazing walk-in polytunnel.

I do think we put our peas in the ground too soon as they don't look very healthy and am also a bit worried about the spuds but I am sure they will appear soon.

I did have to tactically mention to Lucy S that I thought she was putting the onions in a bit too deep - we don't want to make that mistake again!

Things You Never Knew You Needed: 1

It's always important to look good on the plot, whether it's an Axminster shirt or your choice of accessories. Impress your friends and neighbours, if you have any, with this Damson wheelbarrow. Ideal for transporting your plums.

Cultivation and Pop Culture

Any ideas as to what’s going on here? Anyone? Anyone? No, well, it’s a system of cultivation popular in crofting circles called the lazy bed, where a soil improver e.g. compost is laid on difficult ground and the surrounding sods are piled upside down on the top. The system was brought to public attention by the 80s pseudo-jazz pop ensemble and potato enthusiasts Matt Bianco. This allows me to plant my Charlottes and Pink Firs while leaving the toil needed to break-up the subsoil for another season.

Black leaves on blackberry

My new blackberry plant seems to be growing OK lots of new shoots etc, but in some of the older leaves its growing dark and blackening around the edges - any thoughts on what is wrong? I am watering it nearly every night.

Raised expectations

How about this for the ultimate in raised bed chic? The Incas were well known for their vegetable growing (potatoes, tomatoes etc) but Peruvian archaeologists have yet to unearth any raised beds like this. Rhubarb doing well, note (despite yesterday's snow).

Azada - what's wrong with a shovel?

Following the latest post from our Northern correspondent the editorial committee at Shallow Onions has decided to introduce a new thread on garden tools and implements.

Here for your education and amusement are a couple of photos of Azadas - ideal for getting stuck into a variety of soils with less strain on your back used a lot in Spain, Venezuela and parts of Scotland. The old English term may be Mattocks but I will stand corrected (in the next post).

Please post any contribution to this Blog labelled 'unusual tools'. Bonus points to anyone who can name the above.

New Tool on the Plot

Digging is now well under way. The main veg plot is a roughly equilateral triangle with sides around 45m long, which gives about 900 sq metres for veg and soft fruit. That’s three times the size of my old allotment. This excludes the expanse of more steeply sloping land, which will house the orchard and coppice, and the building plot, which once the house is constructed will give perhaps another 500 square metres of growing space with room for a large polytunnel.

Considering the weather conditions of the last week, the soil is incredibly dry – a virtue of the buffer of Quaternary Fluvioglacial Sand and Gravel that lies over the unforgiving Moinian Metamorphic rocks or Boulder Clay which cover much of the inland area around here. I’d like to think it was judicious foresight, but frankly we’d have taken anything. It’s all a far cry from the Oxford Clay and the main problem is going to be drought, because as Al Lotment knows, Forres gets less rainfall than Oxford, although if he studied the stats properly he could probably show it rains more often here. A brisk southwesterly highlighted the other problem. High up the agenda is a shelterbelt of edible hedging along the north and west boundaries.

As the soil has been cattle-grazed, it has a fertile top over a stony compacted subsoil. Valerie thinks we should get someone in to plough it but that would be like paying someone to dig your manure in for you. Instead, I have invested in a few cutting-edge hand tools. I am pictured with my new best friend, my azada, cutting the first sods. I guess you lot are still struggling on with your quaint anachronistic forks and spades. Paul excepted of course. The azada pulls up Stonehenge style boulders from the subsoil, which inspired me to build a dry-stone wall feature to raise the soil up on the downslope side of the veg plot. It can’t compete with the 9”x 2” but one has to make use of the resources at hand. The pressure is now off with rhubarb in and asparagus ready to go once the soil warms up.

Whirled Peas

Was thinking of getting some peas in the ground - any views? Got a shit load of shit filled soil and lots of lines spare. Having a ball over here but missing my garden!

April Fool

Sorry for my recent silence. Home phone is down and been stranded in the hills for a couple of days. More to the point what's all this done to my newly planted rhubarb.

Weather this week

Guess you are all aware but winter is returning with vengeance this week so be sure to cover up your tender bits of veg and seedlings - i am using an old window that i saved - looks absolutely awful but works - i think I am turning into my Dad. Onions have finally decided to make an entrance better late than never.

Phototest

When adding photos be sure to compress first - ps this is my small patch of rocket seems to be doing Ok

Is my garlic ok

I have put my garlic in shallow and the bulbs are above ground is this oK?